Why Pray?

Each week, my husband and I host a small group of folks from our church in our home as we participate in a video Bible study. This semester our study is “Intercessory Prayer” by Dutch Sheets.  In our lesson last week, we talked about the “Why?” of prayer.  If God is sovereign and all powerful – isn’t He just going to do what He wants to anyway?  Why do we need to pray?

     Without trying to re-teach Dutch Sheets’ lesson, I’ll summarize it to say that God gave man dominion on the earth, making him God’s representative here.  When Adam and Eve forfeited that legal right in the fall, Jesus bought it back for all of us.  So now we have the legal right and responsibility to invite God into our situations.

     My husband gave this amazing example to make this much more understandable. It’s just like renting a house.  The landlord owns the house and his name is on the deed, yet because you reside in the house, he has to have your consent to enter the house.  When something in the house breaks or malfunctions, it is your responsibility to bring it to the attention of the owner so he can put things right.  He wants everything to be maintained properly in the house, yet he needs you to inform him of the needs and to give him permission to enter your home to make repairs.

      The Bible says that the earth is the Lord’s and the fullness thereof. Just like a landlord, He retains ownership but gives us the stewardship of the earth.  When something is wrong (and there is so much wrong here) it is our responsibility to make those needs known to the only one who has the right, power and resources to fix them.  When you think about prayer that way, it seems a lot less like a religious exercise and more like an awesome interaction between the God of the universe and a person who He values as having authority to intervene in a situation. 

     

Over the Circumstances

     If you have read much of my blog, you might wonder about where the title Over the Circumstances originated.  One influence was something that I heard long ago from my pastor at that time.  Davy Jo Hissom was an amazing man of God with a great sense of humor who lived life with joy.  He once said that often when he asked people how they were doing, they would answer, “I’m doing ok, under the circumstances”,  to which he would reply, “Well, what are you doing under them things?”  Then he’d always say that he knew that phrase wasn’t good English, but he wasn’t teaching English!

     He was right.  We were designed to live a life that is victorious regardless of what is happening around us and to experience a joy that is not dependent on the current situation. The Bible calls us "overcomers", not "defeated ones".

     The other reason I chose this title was that it’s a lesson that I have learned from my own life.  I had an amazing, happy childhood – secure in the love of my parents, raised to know God, blessed to have many material advantages and interesting experiences.  I enjoyed good health, did well in school, and had good friends. Then within the space of fewer than 3 years, I lost both my mother and my father to cancer. Then because of my own choices in life, I became a single mother which put me in a position of financial and emotional difficulty for quite some time. Even marrying a good man of God did not insulate me from pain and problems.  We have had our share of those as most people have experienced.  Once, someone remarked that they thought I’d had a hard life.  It took me by surprise because even with all the events that I have listed, I’ve never really felt that my life was hard.  I knew others who had struggled with as much or more than I have.  I just thought of all that as just – life.

      When the amazing love of God chased me down and brought me back into relationship with Him, I began to learn the lessons of how to experience joy in the middle of negative circumstances.  Relationship with God puts all things in perspective and I began to see that the day to day events of my life are not all there is to my life.  God has a plan that I cannot begin to understand, but He teaches me through everything that happens in my life – both the things that I can control and those for which I am not responsible. 

     I’m not saying that I spend every minute of every day walking on clouds or that I never feel sad or disappointed; it’s just that I’m not on an emotional roller coaster anymore. When the Bible says, “And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose” (Romans 8:28)– that’s where I find the key.  If I am “the called” according to His purpose and I pursue that first, then I don’t have to be concerned about all the little things that happen day to day.  I know that ultimately, God will use those things to accomplish what He has purposed for my life.

     2 Corinthians 4:17 says, “For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, worketh for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory”.  Sometimes the very things that try our faith are the things that are building us up to be more effective Kingdom people. If walking according to our calling is our primary focus, then this is what we should desire. 

     I wish I could say that I’m always the perfect model of faith regardless of the circumstances in which I find myself.  I’m not.  However, I have found that when I remember this principle in the middle of all that life throws at me, I am most content.  I’ve also walked through situations where God has made Himself very real to me precisely because of what I am experiencing and while I would never want problems, I would rather have Him in the problem than never know Him at all.  I have problems, but the problems don’t have to have me. 

Ask Me Every Day

Several people have told me how much they like the stories in my recent “Lessons from a Baby” series.  There is some background to this continuing saga that I want to share because I think it will be an encouragement to someone.

My son and his wife (Josh and Brittney) have been married for six years.  Both of them have always wanted to be parents and the desire to have a family was in each of their hearts years before they met and married.  Unfortunately, there is a fertility issue and doctors have told them that their only hope of conceiving a child is through in-vitro fertilization (IVF). While they considered this, they also were trained and licensed as foster parents, hoping someday to adopt a child through the foster system because private adoption is far too expensive.

In April of 2015, a sweet baby girl was placed in their home.  Though social workers knew that Josh and Brittney only wanted to foster a child that could be adopted, they persuaded them to take her.  I watched them become parents as they cared for that child. Through all the typical first-year stages, they loved her and helped her grow and develop, all along taking her for visitations to her birth father, knowing that she would probably leave them one day.  That sad day for all of us came in February of 2016 when she went to her father permanently. 

Later in 2016, they were able to attempt IVF with the help of a sweet friend of Brittney’s who was willing to go through the grueling process of being an egg donor for them.  Sadly, that one expensive attempt was not successful.

On one of the early days of January 2017, Brittney wrote something on her Facebook page about the heartbreaking year of 2016 with the loss of the foster baby and the failed IVF attempt.  Her faith amazes me sometimes.  In the middle of all that sadness and disappointment, she was still trusting God to build their family and she shared that hope in the same Facebook post.

The evening that I read her post, I was sitting in my recliner, just thinking about their situation.  I was thinking that I really wished that God would bless them with a child.  I wasn’t even really praying – just mentally wishing.  Now I don’t know how you hear God because I believe He communicates with all of us uniquely, but I saw in my spirit – just like seeing giant capital letters in my mind, “ASK ME EVERY DAY”. 

I have prayed about this situation many times, but not necessarily every day and maybe not with as much dedication and earnestness as I could have.  So, when God tells you to pray about something every day – you pray about it every day! 

Four days later I was sitting at the desk in my home office, working on something or another, when Brittney sent me a Facebook message and asked me if I had time to talk.  They had been contacted by social services and had been asked to take a newborn baby girl.  They had to make a decision by the next day and she wanted to discuss all the issues surrounding this child with us and with Brittney’s parents before she and Josh decided what they wanted to do. Four days later!

Obviously, they decided that they wanted to pursue the adoption of this precious baby and as of just a few days ago, she is now and forever, officially an ELLIS!

I’m not telling you that if you pray for something every single day that your answer will come in four days or a week or a month or a year.  I am saying that we should not give up in prayer. Matthew 7:7 says, “Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you”. (KJV) I’ve read some articles that look at the meaning of this verse in the original Greek and they suggest that a better translation of this would be, “Keep on asking and you will receive what you ask for. Keep on seeking and you will find.  Keep on knocking and the door will be opened to you.” (NLT) 

All I know is that the Holy Spirit prompted me to pray in this way and the result for us is a blessing in our lives every day.  Being a grandmother, watching a little one grow and learn and change again, is teaching me new lessons about God and our relationship with Him constantly.  That’s why so many of my recent blog posts have revolved around her.  I still have much to learn about faith and prayer, but I am so very thankful for the lesson I learned this last year. I think I’ll let Josh and Brittney get her through potty-training before I start praying in the next baby!

(By the way, I asked Brittney to read this and give her permission for me to publish it. She agreed to let me share it, but she told me that I didn’t have to wait to start praying in that next baby! Feel free to start praying in agreement with me. 😊 )

Lessons from a Baby #3: Delight

     While my son and his wife were out of town this weekend, my daughter-in-law’s sister kept our granddaughter.  I volunteered to take her for the last few hours of the time they were gone so her aunt could catch up on any sleep she’d lost over the weekend!  This was no great sacrifice for me because I’m a little crazy about this bundle of joy.

     When we arrived at the house, her aunt came to the door carrying the baby and that sweet little girl’s face broke into a huge smile when she saw my husband and me coming through the door.  She bounced in her aunt’s arms and reached for me – so excited to see us.  That brought such delight and joy to my heart.  Knowing that she recognizes us and is happy to be with us is an amazing feeling. When she shows such enthusiasm to be with me, it makes me want to bless her with anything her tiny heart wants.

     Of course, as many little natural occurrences in my life do, this one made me think of how God relates to all of us. I know that He loves us unconditionally, but can’t you just picture the delight and joy that we bring to Him when we are pursuing Him with abandon – when He can see our excitement at spending time with Him?  I wonder if that makes His heart just as eager to bless us as my heart is to treat that little baby to what will please her.

      There are some clues about this in His Word.

     2 Chronicles 16:9a says, “For the eyes of the Lord run to and fro throughout the whole earth, to shew himself strong in the behalf of them whose heart is perfect toward him.”

     The end of this verse echoes that.  Deuteronomy 30:9 “For the Lord will again take delight in prospering you, as he took delight in your fathers.”

     Psalm 37:4 says, “Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart.”

      These are just a few of the many examples that show us that God really wants a relationship with us and has so much to give us – more than we could ever imagine.

     This is not an emotion or attitude that we can fake.  It is born of a real relationship, just like my granddaughter has developed with me in the last year.  How did that happen? She is not yet capable of a conversation.  She can’t read my blog or understand my spoken words.  It happened because she was a helpless newborn who just received all that her parents and extended family provided for her.  She’s been fed and bathed and dressed and kissed and loved and encouraged and celebrated from the day she came into our lives. She has learned to rely on us for all that she needs. She is learning how to communicate her needs to us by reaching out for the things that she wants.  We’ve played silly little baby games with her and she knows what fun is.  You should hear that musical little giggle!  She has lived with all of us – day by day – and she knows us, trusts us, needs us. 

     In our relationship with Jesus, we are as helpless as newborns sometimes.  We need to receive all that He provides for us.  We learn to trust Him for what we need.  We learn to communicate our needs in prayer, although our first attempts at those conversations may be clumsy and awkward.  As that relationship develops, we learn to enjoy spending time with Him.  When we learn to really hear His voice and walk with Him, it even becomes fun!  If you’ve never had that kind of connection with God, it is something that can be cultivated.  It’s not instant, but if you pursue it, it is possible.  I challenge myself, along with you, to put this relationship in the place of the highest priority, so that we will sincerely take delight in God and enjoy the delight that He will take in us.

Spiritual Dehydration

Have you ever felt spiritually “dry”?  Sometimes we feel this way when circumstances in our lives are at a standstill and it seems that our prayers are in vain.  Other times, the situation is the opposite.  When our lives are in a place of peace and rest, we are not driven to trust in God the way that we are in those more trying times and we become absorbed in the managing of our blessings, rather than focusing on our relationship with God.

As I thought about spiritual dryness, God brought some thoughts to my mind about how I deal with dryness in natural situations.  If my hands feel dry, I apply hand lotion. If my mouth is dry, I get a drink of water. If my gas tank runs dry, I fill the tank with gasoline.  The moment I notice the need in those situations, I immediately take care of it. Whey then do I hesitate to run to the remedy when I feel spiritual dryness in my life?

There is only one cure for spiritual dehydration: getting soaked in the water of the Word and the Spirit of God.  The Psalmist says in Psalm 63:1:

“Oh God, You are my God; Early will I seek You; My soul thirsts for You; My flesh longs for You in a dry and thirsty land where there is no water.”

The Bible compares being away from God to being thirsty, but Jesus told us that He would give us living water.  He told the woman at the well:

 “Whoever drinks of this water will thirst again, but whoever drinks of the water that I shall give him will become in him a fountain of water springing up into everlasting life.” (John 4:13-14)

God knew that each of us would feel those times of drought and He made provision for us.  In those moments where our emotions seem to tell us that God is far away, we can know that through the Word and the Spirit which He has given to us, we can find refreshing.

Lessons from a Baby #2: Human Nature

     My granddaughter is all of one year old and she’s already teaching me more than I’m imparting to her.  Just before her recent birthday, her mama was planning to make cupcakes for her party, so I volunteered to take her to my house for the afternoon. I know just how difficult it is to get anything accomplished with an exploring baby underfoot.

      I’ve done a lot of baby-proofing in my house over the last few months since she has mastered crawling, but there are still areas that she tries to access that I don’t necessarily want to her to explore.  One of those areas is behind the recliner in the living room where there is a small trash basket.

     So, on this afternoon, she was happily playing on the floor while I was watching from that very recliner.  Eventually, she crawled toward the chair and began to go around the back of it toward a small space between the recliner and the wall with the aim of checking out that trash basket. Like a responsible grandmother, I’m trying my best to teach her, so I put my arm down between her and the basket and firmly said, “No!”.  Immediately, she put her head down toward the floor and began to cry piteously – like I had just broken her tiny heart.

      Despite the dozen or so toys in my house that were chosen especially for her and the other things in the room that were permissible for her to touch and explore, she only wanted the one thing that I forbid her to touch. That trash basket held items that were of no worth, items that could potentially cause her harm, but that was the target she chose.

     I began to think about that in relation to how we interact with our Father God.  He has given us so many things that were designed for our good and for our pleasure, but in our human sin nature, we reach for the things that have no value and that will hurt us eventually.  I’m not just talking about the so-called “big” sins that most Christians avoid, but even the little things that we put in place of our relationship with God – the useless things that keep us from becoming all that we should. I’m as guilty of this as anyone else I know, so I am definitely not throwing stones.   

     I have a feeling that I’m going to learn many more lessons through the life of our little one.  I hope that you’ll remember this little illustration the next time that you are enticed by something other than God’s best for you and that you’ll respond to that “check” in your spirit that the Holy Spirit brings when He puts His hand of restraint between you and the things that distract you.

Lessons from a Baby #1: No Longer a Newborn

     Almost a year ago, my son and his wife received a very welcome telephone call.  A sweet little baby girl had been born and her birth mother had voluntarily terminated her parental rights.  As licensed foster parents, they were offered the opportunity to take her into their home and eventually adopt her. The court date for finalizing that adoption is happening this week and our family is so excited and happy to see her become a permanent part of our family. 

     This last year has been a joyful time of watching this little person grow and change.  When she first came home, like all babies, all she did was sleep, eat, mess her diapers, and look around a lot.  Now she is a perpetual motion machine: crawling, pulling herself up by grabbing the furniture, clapping her hands, waving bye-bye, and babbling up a storm – just to mention a few of her skills.  In fact, after today I’m convinced that she’s a genius. Her mother called out from my kitchen for us to come and look. She was standing up at the bi-fold doors of my pantry and had figured out how to pull the knob and open the door to the magical, forbidden place that we always pull her out of when we have left one of the doors open.

     I thought about all this development a few days ago. The church talks about people being “born-again”, as we should.  The problem is many people never get past the “sleep, eat, mess their diapers and look around” stage.  They remain newborns.  How sad it would have been if our little one was still in that phase almost a year after her birth.  Though God loves us unconditionally, how tragic it is when His people don’t grow and develop so that they can fulfill the amazing future that He imagines for them.

     I have been a Christian for over 40 years, but do I act like a 40-year-old Christian?  I don’t know the answer to that question because it’s hard to know what that looks like.  I’ve met people who have been saved only a few years whose maturity is amazing and others who are still grabbling with basic principles of the faith years after first coming to Christ.

     In looking at my own life, I have had several long periods of spiritual stagnation. During some of those times, I was running from the call on my life and was dabbling in all the things the world called “life”. Other times I was going through times of complacency, more involved in my own interests and cares than in the life of the Kingdom.  Even now, when I really want to become who God wants me to be, I sometimes get distracted and neglect those things that I know I need to grow. 

     What have we provided that has made it possible for this precious baby to make these strides?  We have fed her, bathed her, clothed her, played with her, talked to her, encouraged, and celebrated her.  We have provided her shelter and times to rest.  We have introduced her to new experiences and taught her new things by modeling them for her. 

     In the same way, God has made provision for our growth through His word, His Holy Spirit, and His church.  We have the food of the Word, the cleansing of the blood of Jesus, the guidance of the Holy Spirit.  Through the Church, He provides us with a place of safety and shelter, as well as a place to experience Him and learn how to serve by watching others operate in their gifts and callings.

     The difference between us and a newborn is that we have the presence of mind to know how growth works and have the decision-making ability to avail ourselves of all the resources that God has given us. I encourage you and remind myself to continue to grow, change, learn and become mature and productive.